Well here I am again. Still watching it snow. And it is still beautiful. I decided not to walk over to meet Chuck today. I want to wait till it is a little more plowed out around the area before I go trudging.
I had my 3 mugs of coffee and am now into the peeing portion of my day.
The computer has been acting real squirrely for the last couple of days now and it gets frustrating at times.
I was reading this devotional on discouragement today. I think it is one of the biggest poisons the devil and his demons use against us. It can start as early as our toddler years at least it did for me. Up until about the last 25yrs or so I was afraid to try new things for fear of failing at them. This goes back to at least kindergarten for me. I have my report card from kindergarten and when I first started the school year, the teacher wrote in it, "Tammy is afraid to try new things for fear of failing at them." I feel quite certain this was because of both my Mom and Dad but especially Dad. Poor Dad he keeps getting fingers pointed at him. The only things he would encourage me to try were things he thought I should be doing. There was only suffocation with that and no real room for growth. I remember in 3rd grade coming home one day and announcing that I wanted to be a teacher when I grew up and my Dad pounced on that and said something like, why would you want to do that for, I have always thought you should be a nurse. Once I realized that Dad wasn't interested in what I might want to do, I never mentioned anything again.
He would push nursing on me periodically throughout the years and I had no interest in being a nurse whatsoever. He didn't get it. My Dad never really knew me and he didn't want to because he had his own ideas of what I should be. I wasn't that person at all.
When I was in high school it was a cross between being a forest ranger and a interior decorator. Too bad that they couldn't have been combined.
When I was sent to Goodwill they gave me a bunch of interest and apttitude tests and because I was so messed up at the time the computer suggested I be either a brick layer or an airplane mechanic. I am surprised my answers to all those questions didn't give the computer a nervous breakdown because I was so confused. I thought that was funny at the time and I still think its funny but also sad.
It wasn't until I was almost 30 that I finally realized what I wanted to be and do with my life was to be an artist. But then there is reality. Oh well I can dream can't I. And all of that to say this. It is so important to be encouraging to people and your loved ones especially. Perhaps if I had, had just one person to encourage me in my life when I was younger I may have turned out to be a completely different person. It took me 40+ yrs to start to believe in myself and feel good about me. What a waste of life. I know for certain that if I had not gotten saved all those yrs ago I would have long gone and been dead. Chuck for that matter too. I told him about the Lord and salvation and then he got saved and it changed his life as well. It is the best decision a person can ever make for themselves. Nothing and I mean absolutely nothing will ever top it.
It is too bad that so many of us have to make a total utter mess out of our lives before we make the decision to get saved. On the other hand these are the kind of people the Lord sought out while He had His ministry here on earth. It reminds me of an old Bill Gaither Trio song. "Something beautiful, something good, all my confusion He understood. All I had to offer Him was brokeness and strife and He made something beautiful out of my life." The Lord accepts and loves us right where we are at. We can be ourselves with Him. He sets us free. He will always encourage us no matter what is going on in our lives. He is for us and not against us. Sometimes it doesn't seem this way, but that is where faith in Him comes in. So much of my life seems like I have been groping my way through a long dark tunnel with only a pinpoint of light wayyyy up ahead to follow. But the Lord has shown me that He is right there walking beside me even when it feels like I am all alone. Feelings aren't facts. Feelings are just that feelings and they can be as wrong as the day is long. They are unreliable. And with that I am ending this discourse.
I had my 3 mugs of coffee and am now into the peeing portion of my day.
The computer has been acting real squirrely for the last couple of days now and it gets frustrating at times.
I was reading this devotional on discouragement today. I think it is one of the biggest poisons the devil and his demons use against us. It can start as early as our toddler years at least it did for me. Up until about the last 25yrs or so I was afraid to try new things for fear of failing at them. This goes back to at least kindergarten for me. I have my report card from kindergarten and when I first started the school year, the teacher wrote in it, "Tammy is afraid to try new things for fear of failing at them." I feel quite certain this was because of both my Mom and Dad but especially Dad. Poor Dad he keeps getting fingers pointed at him. The only things he would encourage me to try were things he thought I should be doing. There was only suffocation with that and no real room for growth. I remember in 3rd grade coming home one day and announcing that I wanted to be a teacher when I grew up and my Dad pounced on that and said something like, why would you want to do that for, I have always thought you should be a nurse. Once I realized that Dad wasn't interested in what I might want to do, I never mentioned anything again.
He would push nursing on me periodically throughout the years and I had no interest in being a nurse whatsoever. He didn't get it. My Dad never really knew me and he didn't want to because he had his own ideas of what I should be. I wasn't that person at all.
When I was in high school it was a cross between being a forest ranger and a interior decorator. Too bad that they couldn't have been combined.
When I was sent to Goodwill they gave me a bunch of interest and apttitude tests and because I was so messed up at the time the computer suggested I be either a brick layer or an airplane mechanic. I am surprised my answers to all those questions didn't give the computer a nervous breakdown because I was so confused. I thought that was funny at the time and I still think its funny but also sad.
It wasn't until I was almost 30 that I finally realized what I wanted to be and do with my life was to be an artist. But then there is reality. Oh well I can dream can't I. And all of that to say this. It is so important to be encouraging to people and your loved ones especially. Perhaps if I had, had just one person to encourage me in my life when I was younger I may have turned out to be a completely different person. It took me 40+ yrs to start to believe in myself and feel good about me. What a waste of life. I know for certain that if I had not gotten saved all those yrs ago I would have long gone and been dead. Chuck for that matter too. I told him about the Lord and salvation and then he got saved and it changed his life as well. It is the best decision a person can ever make for themselves. Nothing and I mean absolutely nothing will ever top it.
It is too bad that so many of us have to make a total utter mess out of our lives before we make the decision to get saved. On the other hand these are the kind of people the Lord sought out while He had His ministry here on earth. It reminds me of an old Bill Gaither Trio song. "Something beautiful, something good, all my confusion He understood. All I had to offer Him was brokeness and strife and He made something beautiful out of my life." The Lord accepts and loves us right where we are at. We can be ourselves with Him. He sets us free. He will always encourage us no matter what is going on in our lives. He is for us and not against us. Sometimes it doesn't seem this way, but that is where faith in Him comes in. So much of my life seems like I have been groping my way through a long dark tunnel with only a pinpoint of light wayyyy up ahead to follow. But the Lord has shown me that He is right there walking beside me even when it feels like I am all alone. Feelings aren't facts. Feelings are just that feelings and they can be as wrong as the day is long. They are unreliable. And with that I am ending this discourse.
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